Not sure if this is a spoof but the the BBC report a newspaper ad from a firm of interpreters looking for translators of "Glaswegian English" for business clients. I particularly love the line that the translators should be able to "understand the nuances" of west of Scotland patter. Far from being offended, I regard this as a positive development. We used to get outraged when sub-titles were added to movies like Trainspotting or Sweet Sixteen. But surely it is an acknowledgement that our language is more than simply a dialect? Stanley Baxter, the greatest Glaswegian interpreter of them all, would approve.
And for anyone reading this blog - say fans of Glasvegas or Polish bus drivers - who struggles with the glottal stop, consult the handy guide at eejitasylum.com And Yappin Yousuf has also blogged about this.
Here's a sample of insults, should you ever need them. Good, intit no?
a face like a chewed caramel'
a face like a bullgod chown a wasp
a face like a burst couch
a face like a burst tomato
a face like a camel eatin sherbet
a face like a Halloween cake
a face like a melted welly
a face like a wee hard disease
a face like a welder's binch(i.e. bench)
a face like a well-skelped arse
a face like it went on fire and somebody put the flames out with a shovel
a face like somebody sat on it before it was set/while it was still wet
a face like you gat at Tam Shepherd's(Glasgow's famous trick & joke shop)